Cotton - Aug. 21, 1995 – Oct. 27, 2011

Is Positive G actually getting soft in this post, you ask. Is he going to show me that he’s actually human? Is he going to prove that his often misunderstood heart is not actually as cold as a Wisconsin winter?

Well, it’s a rare lucky day for you my friend, because the answers are yes, yes, and yes.

While this post does talk about a dog, I am confident that those who are not dog lovers, and perhaps even dog haters, will gain something if you just stick with me.

Cotton, my little West Highland White Terrier had to be put down yesterday. She was 16 years, two months, and one day old. (why I started counting like baby age after she turned 16, I’m not sure)

It was the second time I’ve had to do this with a pet, and neither time was fun. Death, by nature, is not a very pretty thing. It doesn’t matter how well you prepare, how tough you are, or how much you try to talk yourself into thinking it ‘won’t be so bad’. If you’re human, it’s not easy.

Three weeks ago she started losing the use of her back legs; getting noticeably weaker every day. First she couldn’t jump up into my truck. This progressed to not being able to jump onto the floorboard area of the car, and eventually to me carrying her up the stairs, which I didn’t mind. At only 10 pounds it’s not that big of a deal. (the stair thing, however, will be different when my 97 pound dog gets to that point – I might have to break out my old weightlifting belt once again)

By the last day, Cotton’s legs where so weak she couldn’t even stand up in the back yard to do her doggie business, and I decided to break out the long-ago-used doggie diapers. (actually a sort of belt to hold doggie sanitary napkins during that doggie time of the month). I modified them to be able to absorb more than a doggie menstrual flow by using regular ‘overnight’ maxi pads cut in half to fit. This seemed to be a better alternative than trying to make her stand up in the back yard when she couldn’t. She seemed to be more comfortable this way also, since she has always been notoriously cold even in moderate temperatures - and today just happened to be a little cooler than normal, resulting in the first snowfall of the season. By using the doggie diapers she could stay inside all day.

In the morning, when she was half way through eating her normal dog food, I decided enough of that crap, and for the last half of her meal she ate Lucky Charms right along with me.

She fell asleep in her favorite sweater, and in the warm sun as it shone through the window – her favorite thing to do; especially on chilly days – and she slept there most of the day without me bothering her one bit, other than to change her diapers. When she did wake up on occasion, she was usually met with a special dog treat. After that, it was back to doggie dream world.

When it finally came time to hit the road to get to the vet on the other side of town, we made a special detour – through the drive-through at McDonalds for a McDouble with no mustard, and also an apple/caramel sundae  – both were her favorite. The drive-through was probably her favorite place to go in the car. And yes, she got to eat the treats – not me.

By the time we reached the vet, she had a full mustache of caramel and ice cream. She was pretty much in heaven in her own little doggie world. I had said everything to her that I needed to in the days prior to this, and spent time with her today that I normally would have spent working. I was patient with her out in the back yard in the days leading to this day, and I carried her everywhere I could so she wouldn’t have to drag herself on her back hip, while adding to some scabs that were already forming from the times I couldn’t get to her soon enough.

When the time finally came for the final good-bye, it was as good as I believe it could be. Nothing can take away the sting of a ‘loved one’ leaving this earth, but when the sting wears off, I know I will always get a small chuckle thinking about her last minutes with that caramel all over her face, and how happy she was right up to the end. I know that I did everything I could to make her last day on earth one of the best days of her life.

Those of you who are not dog lovers are wondering when I’m going to fulfill my earlier promise I made. What’s in this for non dog lovers?

I’ve mentioned in the past that the best way to treat people really well is to do so as if you know a little secret that they don’t – that it’s their last day to live.

I could have complained about changing my dog’s ‘diapers’. I could have rushed her and yelled at her in the back yard for taking her time and getting distracted instead of just doing her business. I could have hurriedly given her the normal breakfast and spent my usual day working. I could have went straight to the vet without stopping to give her what she loved so much. But I didn’t. And as a result, I feel very good about those decisions. I had two choices; treat her how I would like to be treated on my last day, or treat her the same as every other day – and forever wish I would had chosen option number one.

While it’s not realistic to think we could give everyone we know a ‘last supper’ treatment every day of the week, (I mean, Betty in accounting IS always a pain in the *ss), it doesn’t hurt to do the best we can to remember that no matter what situation is presented to us, we still have a choice in how we react. How we react dictates how we feel from that moment forward. How we feel from that moment forward is what we call life.

Choose wisely.

What did you hear at the top of the stairs?

Mike Vance spent years in charge of idea and people development for Walt Disney Productions. A phenomenal mind in the area of creativity, and 'thinking outside of the box', I was fortunate to hear him speak on a few different occasions.

During his presentations he often mentions how what we hear 'at the top of the stairs' shapes the way we become, and how we shape our lives. Being 'at the top of the stairs' referred to a time when most homes had some sort of staircase going the the second floor. At the top, there was an area that had a rail and spindles. Children were able to sit quietly in that area and listen in to conversations of the adults down in the family room.

It was often 'at the top of the stairs' where we heard what the adults thought of us, our strengths, and our weaknesses.

Today this is figurative, and it may simply refer to wherever we were at the time we heard those who were influential in our lives speak of us in positive, and sometimes unflattering, ways.

It's usually after hearing what others think of us, or what they think we are supposed to become, that we choose our path in life - usually at the expense of truly doing what we would like to do, and often not doing what we would be much better at.

When we live our lives through the eyes of someone else, we often create not one, but two failures. We will never live up to what someone else wants us to be, and we will never be happy living the life someone else has 'chosen' for us.

So, what are you doing? Are you living your life through the eyes of someone else, based on what someone else thinks of you? Or, are you living the life you have chosen?

Choose wisely. That one single choice may be the biggest decision you ever make.

Change for the better?

Why is it that the invention of plastic bags has seemingly changed the way we great each other? Now, almost single-handedly, there seems to be no equal in terms of how one particular product has  replaced our standard way of greeting people. Instead of the ‘old’ way of saying “Hi, how are you today?” It now seems to simply be, “Paper or plastic?”

I’m not sure why it couldn’t be, ‘Hi, how are you today? Would you like paper or plastic?’ Why must we completely eliminate our old system of pleasantly greeting each other first, and then follow that with the cold questions of grocery functionality? Why can’t today’s workers integrate a normal greeting, followed by that moronic phrase?

Perhaps it won’t be long before we are walking down the street and the greeting there, as we pass each other, will also be, “Paper or plastic?”. Surely I jest, yet this may actually be preferable to the way most people pass each other today with a blank stare. Similarly, being lost in a cell phone conversation, or listening to your new favorite songs on an i-pod while blocking out the rest of the apparently unimportant world isn’t a whole lot better. At least if we said “Paper or plastic?” to everyone we encountered, it would be a start back to that age-old thing we used to call ‘communication’.

Maybe the best thing that could happen would be to simply eliminate the ‘paper’ option at the grocery store all together. At least then they would have to say something a little more intelligent. But then again, it might turn into, “Bag, or no bag?”

Yeah, I’ll just carry it all by hand. Forget I even brought this up….

In the land of the blind...

...the one-eyed man is king.

How do you survive a shark attack? You don't have to swim faster than the shark, you just need to swim faster than your friend.

I was watching a swimming event during the last Olympics. One of the heats had three place-finishers with a times that were contained within 1/10th of a second. The times ended in .03, .04. and .09.

This reminded me that the winners in any sport are often separated by just fractions of a second. In horse and auto racing, the distances can be incredibly small.

It is this way with pretty much everything in life. Political races have been won by one vote, the difference between getting a job or not getting a job can be based on one word in your resume, and getting something you've always wanted may simply be yours because you asked, and the other guy didn't. In fact when I ran a painting business my motto was simply, 'We'll Show Up'. That's all it takes since most contractors don't.

You don't have to be vastly superior to anyone to be the best in your niche, or category, or sport. Sometimes the difference-maker is just running that extra lap, working that extra hour, or getting out of bed just a half hour earlier than your competition, every day.

The next time you want to be king, remember the majority of the world is 'blind', and all it might take is doing that one little 'extra' thing.